Participation Trophy

Verse 1

I made you breakfast every Sunday, burnt the toast but I triedI learned the names of all your cousins and your ex's dog that diedI went to every one of your office parties in a tieAnd you left me for a guy who plays the saxophone. Why

Pre-Chorus

And it's not about the winningIt's about the taking partThat's what my mother told meWhen she handed me my heart

Chorus

I got a participation trophyFor showing up and losing youIt's gold, well, it's plastic painted goldAnd it says "good job, you tried, you're through"I put it on the mantelNext to the plant that diedI got a participation trophyFor loving you with all my life

Verse 2

I wrote a song about you, it was really, really longI played it at your birthday and you left before the chorus came alongI even took up running, and I ran into a treeBut the ambulance was friendly, so that's still a win for me

Pre-Chorus

And it's not about the winningIt's about the taking partThat's what my mother told meWhen she handed me my heart

Chorus

I got a participation trophyFor showing up and losing youIt's gold, well, it's plastic painted goldAnd it says "good job, you tried, you're through"I put it on the mantelNext to the plant that diedI got a participation trophyFor loving you with all my life

Bridge

Everything drops out except a lonely guitar, falsetto

If there was a second placeI'd take it, I'd take itIf there was a second placeI wouldn't even fake it

Final Chorus

Full band, crunchy and loud

I got a participation trophyFor showing up and losing youIt's gold, well, it's plastic painted goldAnd it says "good job, you tried, you're through"I put it on the mantelNext to the plant that diedI got a participation trophyFor loving you with all my life

Outro

Deadpan, spoken-sung

Thanks for having me